How do you process a negative event that occurs in your life? My internal loop looks like this.
1. Shock. 2. Fear
Then after shock and fear have done their work, out come the questions, then I fill in the blank with stories.
The first question, is why did this happen? Then I begin to tell a story, but the next thing that occurs is a redirection. Still, in a harsh redirection, I make an accusation and call myself a name.
I move on to another question, and this goes on and on, over and over.
External, I do the right things, acknowledge, offer to help, pray, seek my own internal support, prayer, writing.
What could be different?
What have I noticed about how I process difficult events.
I am mean to myself. I have trained myself that being nice to others means being mean to myself.
What if it were different?
Instead of a harsh redirection, simply choose to listen, comfort, and care for the scared individual.
You are scared. You need comfort too. Acknowledge the fear. Write it down. Pray about it.
Why am I that way? I just don’t know. It is what it is.
The lesson learned is that occurring yourself internally isn’t the way to move through a negative event.